Episode guide
Season 3 (2001/2002)
After a year away due to the show's cancellation only to be renewed due to fans campaigning for the show for it to be renewed, "Family Guy" was back on our screens for a third season. However, the third season was subject to the same dire scheduling that the previous season had suffered from. As a result the viewer ratings fell and Fox cancelled the show for the second, and what at the time looked final, time.
Whilst the third season ended in 2002, the originally banned episode "When You Wish Upon a Weinstein" was shown for the first time in the US by Adult Swim in 2003 and so we associate it as the final episode of the third season.
301/2ACX17 - The Thin White Line (1)
Written by Steve Callaghan and directed by Glen Hill
First broadcast: Wednesday July 11, 2001
Searching for meaning in life, Brian decides to devote his time to helping others. Using his keen sense of smell, he gets a job with the local police department and becomes the top-dog - until his nose gets him into trouble.
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User rating for The Thin White Line (1): 88.7 % (based on 280 votes)
302/2ACX20 - Brian Does Hollywood (2)
Written by Gary Janetti and directed by Gavin Dell
First broadcast: Wednesday July 18, 2001
In the conclusion of a two-part story line, Brian leaves Quahog for Hollywood in order to write films. When the Griffins visit him in Los Angeles, he desperately takes the first job offered to him in order to impress them - and finds himself directing a porno. Faced with fame and loneliness in his new field, Brian realizes that every dog needs a home. Stewie goes on "Kids Say the Darndest Things".
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User rating for Brian Does Hollywood (2): 87.2 % (based on 206 votes)
303/2ACX11 - Mr. Griffin Goes to Washington
Written by Ricky Blitt and directed by Brian Hogan
First broadcast: Wednesday July 25, 2001
A conglomerate buys Happy Go Lucky Toys and installs Peter as president. The conglomerate also owns a tobacco company, and before long Peter is on his way to Washington to testify before Congress on the benefits of smoking.
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User rating for Mr. Griffin Goes to Washington: 89.6 % (based on 227 votes)
304/2ACX19 - One If By Clam, Two If By Sea
Written by Bobby Bowman and directed by Scott Wood
First broadcast: Wednesday August 1, 2001
Peter and his mates catch a beer-besotted version of the "Spirit of `76" when a Brit buys the Drunken Clam and turns it into an English pub. As it happens, pub owner Nigel Pinchley and his family move in next door to the Griffins, and Stewie plays `Enry `Iggins to Nigel's Cockney-accented 3-year-old daughter.
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User rating for One If By Clam, Two If By Sea: 86.0 % (based on 230 votes)
305/2ACX22 - ...And The Wiener Is
Written by Mike Barker and Matt Weitzman and directed by Bert Ring
First broadcast: Wednesday August 8, 2001
Meg makes the flag-girl squad at James Woods High. That's "almost a cheerleader," she boasts, but it doesn`t impress the cool kids.
Meanwhile, Peter develops a severe case of Chris-envy.
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User rating for ...And The Wiener Is: 89.4 % (based on 194 votes)
306/2ACX21 - Death Lives
Written by Mike Henry and directed by Rob Renzetti
First broadcast: Wednesday August 15, 2001
Peter pays a price when he plays golf on his anniversary--he's struck by lightning. The Grim Reaper, who guides Peter through his "near death experience," which leads to a "revelation" concerning Lois. Also, Peter offers the Reaper some dating tips.
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User rating for Death Lives: 89.5 % (based on 216 votes)
307/2ACX18 - Lethal Weapons
Written by Chris Sheridan and directed by Brian Hogan
First broadcast: Wednesday August 22, 2001
With a few tae-jitsu lessons under her black belt, Lois turns herself into Quahog's answer to Xena, cutting a wide swath through the hordes of obnoxious leaf-peeping tourists from New York. But soon her violent ways begin to hit home.
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User rating for Lethal Weapons: 90.3 % (based on 227 votes)
308/3ACX02 - Kiss Seen Round The World
Written by Mark Hentemann and directed by Pete Michels
First broadcast: Wednesday August 29, 2001
Meg gets an internship at a TV station. It's a dream job...because she thinks the station's male anchor is dreamy. But it turns nightmarish when the station's other intern, “the biggest dork on the planet,” gets a crush on her. Meanwhile, a bully steals Stewie's tricycle.
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User rating for Kiss Seen Round The World: 74.1 % (based on 228 votes)
309/3ACX04 - Mr Saturday Knight
Written by Steve Callaghan and directed by Michael Dante DiMartino
First broadcast: Wednesday September 5, 2001
Peter's boss, Mr. Weed, dies suddenly (at the Griifins' house, as it happens), and the toy factory dies with him. Not surprisingly, Peter's “career transition” is less than smooth. Then he decides to follow his 25-year-old dream and become a jouster at Quahog's Renaissance Faire.
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User rating for Mr Saturday Knight: 86.5 % (based on 220 votes)
310/3ACX05 - Fish Out Of Water
Written by Alex Borstein and Mike Henry and directed by Bert Ring
First broadcast: Wednesday September 19, 2001
A jobless Peter decides on a line of work fit for “a real New England man”: he becomes a fisherman. But there's something fishy about the bank that finances his boat. Meanwhile, Meg and Lois do some serious spring-break partying (Lois does, anyway) at Rhode Island's Narragansett Beach.
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User rating for Fish Out Of Water: 88.7 % (based on 208 votes)
311/3ACX01 - Emission Impossible
Written by David Collard and Ken Goin and directed by Peter Shin
First broadcast: Thursday November 8, 2001
Peter and Lois are inspired by her pregnant sister Carol to have another baby. Stewie is appalled at the prospect of another sibling and vows to keep Lois and Peter from sleeping together. After various attempts to stop them, Stewie shrinks himself down to a microscopic size and enters Peter's body in hopes of destroying all of his sperm.
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User rating for Emission Impossible: 93.6 % (based on 423 votes)
312/3ACX09 - To Live and Die in Dixie
Written by Steve Callaghan and directed by Dan Povenmire
First broadcast: Thursday November 15, 2001
Waylon Jennings has a voice cameo in an episode in which the Griffins discover Southern hospitality--courtesy of the Witness Protection Program. They're in hiding because the convenience-store thief Chris fingers escapes from jail and vows revenge. But should he track Chris down, he'll have to contend with Sheriff Peter Griffin.
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User rating for To Live and Die in Dixie: 94.5 % (based on 548 votes)
313/3ACX08 - Screwed The Pooch
Written by Dave Collard and Ken Goin and directed by Pete Michels
First broadcast: Thursday November 29, 2001
Peter can't stop trying to impress Lois' father, Mr. Pewterschmidt, and Brian can't take his eye off Pewterschmidt's racing grayhound.
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User rating for Screwed The Pooch: 90.2 % (based on 196 votes)
314/3ACX06 - Peter Griffin - Husband, Father...Brother?
Written by Mike Barker and Matt Weitzman and directed by Scott Wood
First broadcast: Thursday December 6, 2001
Chris adopts hip-hop speech and Peter decides it's time to teach his son about his roots. Meanwhile, Stewie becomes enchanted with the Buddy Cianci Junior High cheerleaders.
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User rating for Peter Griffin - Husband, Father...Brother?: 91.6 % (based on 236 votes)
315/3ACX07 - Ready, Willing & Disabled
Written by Alex Barnow and Marc Firek and directed by Andi Klein
First broadcast: Thursday December 20, 2001
Joe compete`s in the Special People`s Games.
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User rating for Ready, Willing & Disabled: 87.6 % (based on 158 votes)
316/2ACX03 - A Very Special Family Guy Freakin' Christmas
Written by Danny Smith and directed by Brian Hogan
First broadcast: Friday December 21, 2001
Lois snaps when the family Christmas plans all go wrong. peter accidently gives away all the presents, and brian burns the house down. Stewie is terrified of Santa Claus and how this big fat man in a red suit can watch over the World's children 24 hours a day all the time.
Stewie plays the part of baby Jesus with a tranquilizer gun!
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User rating for A Very Special Family Guy Freakin' Christmas: 83.2 % (based on 556 votes)
317/3ACX03 - Brian Wallows & Peter's Swallows
Written by Allison Adler and directed by Dan Povenmire
First broadcast: Thursday January 17, 2002
Brian, depressed over bad luck in love, is convicted of DUI and sentenced to care for an ornery old woman whose past comes to the attention of celebrity watcher A.J. Benza. Meanwhile, Peter grows a beard, which displeases Lois (who isn't alone in thinking that it's for the birds).
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User rating for Brian Wallows & Peter's Swallows: 83.3 % (based on 171 votes)
318/3ACX11 - From Method To Madness
Written by Mike Barker and Matt Weitzman and directed by Bert Ring
First broadcast: Thursday January 24, 2002
Brian expresses an interest in stage work (again), and so Lois encourages him to sign-up for an audition.
At the audition, Brian fails to impress the judges, but then Stewie gets up and demands that Brian is given a second chance, resulting in Stewie being enrolled at the Quahog Performing Arts School. At the school Stewie meets Olivia, and soon the two of them are performing together on stage, until their behind-the-scenes arguements get out of control and the two split.
Meanwhile, Meg gets her first boyfriend after the Griffin family go for dinner at a nudist family`s home.
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User rating for From Method To Madness: 89.7 % (based on 212 votes)
319/3ACX10 - Stuck Together Torn Apart
Written by Mark Hentemann and directed by Michael Dante DiMartino
First broadcast: Thursday January 31, 2002
When Peter discovers that his wife Lois has been meeting an ex-boyfriend behind his back, he is struck with jealously. The two of them end up going to see a marriage counsellor who suggests a trial separation where they should try and see other people.
Meanwhile, Stewie and Brian get stuck together.
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User rating for Stuck Together Torn Apart: 88.0 % (based on 268 votes)
320/3ACX13 - Road to Europe
Written by Daniel Palladino and directed by Dan Povenmire
First broadcast: Thursday February 7, 2002
Peter and Lois take some time away from the kids to go and see Kiss play a live concert in Rhode Island, leaving Brian in charge of Stewie. However, after waving off Peter and Lois, Brian discovers that Stewie has gone on his own little excursion to Europe in search of Jolly Farm the setting of a children's show that Stewie is addicted too from England. Brian chases after Stewie, and soon the two of them find themselves in the Middle East and have to cross Europe to try and return to Quahog.
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User rating for Road to Europe: 93.4 % (based on 334 votes)
321/3ACX12 - Family Guy Viewer Mail 1
Written by unknown and directed by Scott Wood
First broadcast: Thursday February 14, 2002
In this episode, presented by Stewie and Brian, we are presented with three independent stories based upon suggestions by viewers (or so the episode claims): in the first part Peter finds a genie who gives him three wishes; in the second part the Griffin's gain super-powers after a truck carry radioactive waste crashes outside of their home; in the final part we get a glimpse into the lives of the citizens of Quahog when they were kids.
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User rating for Family Guy Viewer Mail 1: 88.0 % (based on 289 votes)
322/2ACX05 - When You Wish Upon a Weinstein
Written by Ricky Blitt and directed by Dan Povenmire
First broadcast: Monday November 10, 2003
Peter attempts to get Chris converted to Judaism to help him perform better at school after meeting a Jewish accountant who helps him get back some money he was conned out of by Jim Kaplan.
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User rating for When You Wish Upon a Weinstein: 87.1 % (based on 235 votes)
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